


Binders and Bubble Baths

by The_starstruck_prince



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: M/M, Trans Alexander Hamilton, modern college au, you can tear this headcanon from my cold dead fingers bc im projecting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-13
Updated: 2017-06-13
Packaged: 2018-11-13 17:54:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11190288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_starstruck_prince/pseuds/The_starstruck_prince
Summary: im projectingfind me on tumblr, @the-starstruck-prince or @drabbles-of-a-cosmonaut !! <3





	Binders and Bubble Baths

Alexander had a rather nasty habit of working himself to the point where he wouldn’t sleep for days on end, and then pass out for 12+ hours. Of course, Thomas basically had to force him to eat and shower, because if he didn’t he knew Alexander would forget. Honestly, it scared Thomas that his boyfriend could just shut off his body like that. He knew that he had come from a rough childhood, and he had no choice but to learn how to do that, but it would still scare the hell out of Thomas when Alexander worked so much that he forgot what day it was.

Thomas tried to flex his schedule around Alexander’s as much as possible, but it was hard with college. It was a more “take what you get and don’t throw a fit” situation when it came to scheduling classes. Thankfully, Thomas’s schedule was usually pretty open, so he had time to spend with Alexander. They tried to see each other every day, and more often than not, Thomas would end up bringing fast food to Alex’s dorm and they’d eat dinner together and cuddle for a while. Sometimes Thomas stayed the night if he didn’t have a morning class- those were the mornings he loved. He would wake up with Alexander in his arms, curled up against his chest, breathing softly, and the only thing Thomas could think was how much he loved Alexander.

It was February, pulling on into March, so finals were near, looking like a distant thunderstorm. Thomas was busier than usual studying, and if Thomas was busy studying, then that meant that Alexander was doing twice as much work. Thomas tried to send him texts as often as possible, but there was no telling if Alexander would actually look at them or not.

However, it was bordering on the fourth day that Thomas hadn’t been able to see Alexander, and it was eating away at him. He rushed to his dorm after his last class, dropping off his bag, thankful that he got off at around 2:30. He then made his way to Alexander’s dorm, eager to make up for lost time with his boyfriend. He knocked on the door a few times before coming in, closing the door behind him.

“Alexander, darlin’?” Thomas called out. The brunette was nowhere to be seen. The dorm was a mess- papers littered the floor, scrawling cursive nearly illegible. Thomas stopped a second, holding his breath, listening; sure enough, he heard a small shuffling sound, and a hiccup, followed with a sniffle. He realized it was coming from the bathroom, and Thomas frowned, moving over to the door and tapping his knuckles on the hollow wood.

“Darlin’?”

Another sniffle. “Go away…”

“Alexander, let me in,” Thomas pleaded, pressing his ear to the door. There was silence for a moment, then, ever so softly, a whisper.

“Door’s unlocked…”

Thomas opened the door, slipping into the bathroom. Alexander sat on the floor, back pressed up against the wall. His eyes were red and swollen, and the bags under his eyes were especially dark. He sniffled again, refusing to meet Thomas’s gaze. The taller of the two sank to the floor, sitting across from him. “What’s going on, what’s happened?” He said. He reached out to take one of Alexander’s hands, but the other pulled his arm away, folding them across his chest.

“Come here,” Thomas whispered. “Let me hold you.” Alex shook his head again, his shoulders shrugging pathetically. “Alexander, please, look at me.” He reached out again, gingerly cupping the other boy’s chin. He finally met his gaze, bottom lip quivering. “Please tell me what happened.”

That’s all it took for Alexander to break. Thick tears gathered in his eyes, sliding down his face and hitting the cold tiles. “Oh, baby, come here,” Thomas opened his arms, and Alex shuffled forward, immediately melting into the embrace. As sobs racked his body, Thomas just sat there and rocked him, cooing in his ear and stroking his hair. He could tell it had been days since he had showered, and he silently cursed himself for not checking up on Alexander.

When Alex’s tears ran out, he hiccups and buried his head in the crook of Thomas’s neck. Thomas scooped him up in his arms, carrying him out of the bathroom and sitting down on his bed. “Will you tell me what’s wrong?” Thomas asked. With a sigh, Alexander peeled himself off of Thomas, sitting back. He took a deep breath, looking away.  
“I’m so disgusting… I don’t deserve you. I’m just a worthless, pathetic loser who’s pretending to be something sh-she’s not.” Alexander’s voice hitched when he referred to himself as a girl, and Thomas stiffened, immediately knowing what was going on. “I-I’m never going to be a boy, I’m going to be in this disgusting, fat body forever and th-there’s so many better people out there for you, actual boys, pretty girls. I’m nothing compared to you, I can’t give back anything to you that you give me-”

“Alexander, listen to me.” Thomas’s voice was steady. He grabbed Alex’s hand, pressing a soft-lipped kiss to his knuckles. “You are a real boy. You aren’t disgusting, or worthless. You mean the world to me. I’m serious. You’re my entire life, I can’t remember what it was like before I met you. So what you aren’t skinny? So what if you have breasts? I don’t care. I love every single inch of you. I love you for you. I love you. I love you. I love you.” Tears threatened to surface, and Thomas let them.

“I’m in love with you, Alexander Hamilton. Nothing will ever change that, ever.”

Thomas pulled Alexander back into his lap, first pressing a kiss to his forehead, then the tip of his nose, and then his lips. Sweet, chaste kisses, murmuring “I love you” in between each of them. He wrapped his arms around Alexander’s waist loosely, peppering his face with kisses till the brunette was laughing.

“Stop it Thomas, I get it, stop,” Alexander smiled, leaning forward to kiss Thomas gently. After a moment, he pulled away. “I don’t know what I’d do without you…” He whispered, tracing abstract designs into Thomas’s thigh with his fingertip. “Work yourself to death,” Thomas answered, tugging at Alexander’s shirt. “Cmon. You’re still wearing your binder. Take it off and breathe for a bit.”

Alex frowned, but complied, tugging off his shirt and peeling off his binder. As soon as it was off, he flung it on the floor, laying back into the mattress and breathing a sigh of relief. Thomas chuckled softly. “Roll over, let me massage your back. I know how tense your shoulders get.” He smiled, glad that Alex was comfortable enough to shed his binder.

He remembered the first time Alex took off his binder around him, how he was a blushing mess, covering himself up. Thomas hand gently pulled his arm away, not looking away from Alexander’s eyes as he told him that he didn’t have to be embarrassed. Looking back on it, that moment was probably the thing that cemented their relationship; it had finally passed the point where it wasn’t just a couple of teenagers making out at frat parties- it was meaningful.

Alexander giggled, rolling onto his stomach and resting his chin on his crossed arms. Thomas straddled his lower back, pressing his palms down and rolling them into the tight muscles of his boyfriend’s back. As Thomas massaged relief into his back, Alexander buried his face into his arms, letting out moans every so often. Once Thomas was sure that he had worked out all the knots, he sat back, patting the small of Alex’s back.

“Cmon, get up,” he said, pushing himself off the bed. Alex groaned. “Jus’ wanna lay here… Lay with me Thomas, let’s nap together…” “Bath first.” Came the reply. Thomas kicked off his shoes, padding back to the bathroom. Alexander sat up as he heard the water turn on. He smiled to himself, getting up as well. “I’m only getting in if you get in with me,” he said, crossing his arms over his bare chest, leaning against the doorframe.

“That was the plan, darlin’,” Thomas said, grinning when his southern drawl came out. He knew it was Alexander’s favourite nickname, so he didn’t miss a chance to use it. “Now hurry up and get in the tub, the water’s gonna get cold.” Alexander rolled his eyes, stripping off his pants and underwear and settling into the suds. Thomas followed shortly after, sitting behind him.

Alexander leaned back against Thomas’s chest, exhaling slowly, practically dissolving in the warm water. They stayed like that for a bit, before Thomas made him sit up. “It’s killing me, I’m sorry, I have to wash your hair, it’s so greasy,” he murmured. Alexander snorted, but was more than happy to let him work his fingers into his scalp. He hummed his approval, eyes closed as Thomas continued with his gentle touches.

“Mmm… Thomas?” Alexander murmured, after they had finished up and dried off. They were in Alexander’s bed now, cuddling and basking in each other.

“Yes?”

“Thank you… I love you so much…” Alexander opened his eyes, pressing his lips against Thomas’s. “You’re so good to me…” He murmured.

Thomas smiled against his lips. “I love you too, Alexander.”

**Author's Note:**

> im projecting
> 
> find me on tumblr, @the-starstruck-prince or @drabbles-of-a-cosmonaut !! <3


End file.
